Soft Sculptures For the Hard Hearted

Etsy Store

Croshame Mega-Sale!

That’s right, you heard it here first, folks (or, if you were directed here from another source, you may have heard it here second). For a limited time throughout the month, four of my Croshame Etsy pieces are on mega-sale!

(*puts on best used car salesman voice*)

The Exorcist Playset has been blasphemously lowered from $250 to $150!

That’s a nauseatingly huge savings of $100!! Get that yarn vomit while it’s steamin’ hot!

Exorcist Playset, 2010

Crochetin’ In Blood has been GOUGED from $90 to $70!

Yeee-OWCH! That’s gotta hurt!

Crochetin' in Blood, 2012

The  Who Killed Nancy-gurumi set has been SLASHED from $95 to $75!

Whaaat?!!! These prices are killing me!

 And Hogtied has been SLICED from $90 to $70!

That’s one chunky slab of savings!Hogtied, 2010

Sale prices and supplies are limited, so if you ever felt like owning these pieces but were an Andrew Jackson or two short, now is your opportunity to scoop them up!


New & cuddly Croshame Christmas characters

I’m proud to introduce two new members of my Croshame family, each accompanied by their own irritating Christmas poem!

Braindeer

Braindeer

One reindeer too many. Oh, what to do?

Bring him round back and grab the shotgun, too.

Braindeer brain detailHe’s too pretty to eat, so no venison this year.

Instead let’s stuff and mount him, our little Braindeer.

Braindeer closeup tongueA holiday decoration bringing smiles left and right,

But they’ll be no visions of sugarplums for this guy tonight.

Braindeer with mantle 2

Over the mantle with care, in silence he’ll hang

Keeping watch over Christmas and bringing in 2014 with a bang.

(AVAILABLE AT THE ETSY STORE HERE)

Santa Clawed

Santa Clawed fully fullThis year St. Nick got quite a nasty surprise

When a flock of wild fowl went after his eyes.

Santa Clawed closeup long faceBirds circled his head as fast as a rocket

and tore his orbs out, each one plucked from its socket.

Santa Clawed face close upwardBlood-curdling screams came from his belly,

and his eyeholes, they glistened like cranberry jelly.

Santa Clawed backSo watch in the skies and mark my words:

Goodwill towards man is NOT for the birds.

(AVAILABLE IN THE ETSY STORE HERE)


Week long holiday sale on select Croshame items!

All this week get 10-20% off select items at the Croshame Etsy store! Just look under the shop section “SEASONAL ANXIETY SALE” for marked down pieces. (Sale will end next Monday, December 9th.)

Addam full 480

 


Honed for the Horror-days

Looking for the perfect way to avoid that big-box shopper stampede while giving a unique gift and supporting handmade art? Well, just in time for this year’s Christmas consumerism feeding frenzy, the Croshame Etsy store is being stocked for the holidays!

Stock Shelf 2

Most of the Croshame “classics” are either presently in stock or can be custom ordered and made especially for you and yours this season! I’m currently working on a couple of new Christmas-themed pieces that I will unveil shortly, as well as preparing to set up a week-long holiday sale closer to December.

I’m also accepting commissions this year, but keep in mind that special order requests can take some time to complete, so please try to get your orders in early to ensure they arrive in time for your particular celebratory occasion. Thanks everyone!

Etsy Banner

(Click the sassy new banner above to visit the store!)


Back from vacation!

The Etsy store has been reopened. Please feel free to purchase items to your heart’s content! (Click image below to get to shop listings)

BLOG ETSY LINK

I’m also considering customers’ commissions once again; for details please see the “Commissions and Sales” page here:  http://croshame.com/sales-and-commissions/ 

Thanks everyone!


2013 means ch-ch-ch-changes

With a new year comes new changes, and this year that adage also applies to Croshame. There will be several differences in the way Croshame operates in 2013, specifically because I’m going to be working on several big projects this year, but also because I’d like to concentrate more on making more fine art and creating new Croshame pieces.

NEW PIECES: Although I will still be making new Antigurumi characters and posting them here on croshame.com, I will no longer be making those featured pieces available for sale through the Etsy store. Don’t fret; there are still a plethora of “classic” Croshame characters that will be available.

COMMISSIONS: I will no longer be accepting commissions, at least for a while.

PATTERNS: I probably won’t be releasing any new patterns this year. This is partly related to one of the aforementioned “big projects” I’m working on, but I won’t mention anything else about that until things are a bit more fully formed.

Thanks to everyone for making 2012 a great year for Croshame! Here ‘s to a 2013 filled with many crass crafts and lotsa laughs.


Back in Business

As some of you may have read in a previous post, I took some much-needed time off from Croshame to make the move from San Francisco to Denver. It’s been a crazily busy couple of months, but now that I’m somewhat settled and have gotten my yarn and supplies out of storage, I’m ready to start crocheting again.

The Croshame Etsy Store has been reopened, and I’m set to start taking orders and commissions. Anything that’s marked “Ready to Ship” in the listing title is precisely that — a finished product that’s eager to make its way onto your doorstep ASAP.

HOWEVER — if you would like to order something marked in the listing title as “CUSTOM” or you’d like me to make you a special request or commission to be shipped out by the holidays, please get your orders in by November 7th. (Or if you don’t give a toss about Christmas, just order them whenever!)

Unfortunately I have very limited time and arm strength this year and won’t be able to work my crazy speed-crochet magic as I have in years past, so please remember that my two doozies, the Krampus figure and the Exorcist Playset, as well as more specific commissions, can take at least 2-3 weeks to complete.

I’m also hoping to make some neato-keen changes to the site and additions to the gallery and catalog in the upcoming months, so there will be all the more Croshame to love…

…or despise!


Moving On Up (and a little to the East side)

Next month my husband and I will be moving to Denver, CO — a pretty big deal for me considering I’ve never lived outside of San Francisco before. I know I’ll miss the foggy ol’ girl, but  it’s high time for a change of scenery after shackling myself to the Golden Gate for over three decades.

The Ladies Fancywork Society‘s Blue Bear Installation @ The Denver Convention Center 

Unfortunately, conducting business with half-filled moving boxes and my personal belongings piled everywhere is more than a bit challenging, so the Croshame Etsy store will be temporarily closing for a little while starting July 15th. I’m not sure for how long, exactly, but I’m hoping it won’t be more than 1-2 months. Please feel free to make purchases before the hiatus; although some of my more labor intensive custom pieces (Exorcist, Krampus) have been taken down, there’s still a lot of ready-to-ship items and other custom product available. So if you have a hankering for some summertime Antigurumi, be sure to scoop it up!

I know I’ve been pretty lax about blog posting lately, but I’m going to try to continue to post here in the interim as I have some new, non-sale work I’ve been meaning to show off, as well as some other forthcoming projects and scheduled events. Once I’m settled in, I’m hoping things will be back to normal and I can start making and posting new things again, but for right now all my nervous energy is permitting me to do is bust out dozens and dozens of afghan motifs and hexagons.

One thing’s for sure… even if it is currently 90 degrees there, at least I’ll have something to keep me cozy in Denver.


Etsy Update 6/3/12… and Giveaway!

Yes, yes, giveaway! But first, let me tell you what’s new in the shop!

I’ve introduced a new option to customize colors when you order a Wolfy Baby or a Viking Hat; just pick the two colors you’d like and I’ll whip ‘em up for you!

Next up, Wolfy Baby’s new distant cousin, Yeti Baby. Available here!

 Last but not least, the popular “Anton Crochet” devil cap — as seen at Maker Faire! Found here.

OKAY! Now onto the GIVEAWAY!!

Starting today and lasting through the month of June, anyone who makes a purchase (within the U.S.) from the Croshame Etsy Shop will be automatically entered into the 1st Official Croshame Customer Appreciation Giveaway!

I’ve put together a prize package with the following items (worth over $50!):

  • A Croshame sticker set, featuring adorable drawings of Wolfy Baby, Tuggin’ At My Heartstrings and other Croshame creations
  • A Crothulhu print
  • Your very own Anton Crochet Devil Cap (available in Small, Medium, or Large)!!

All you have to do for your chance to win is to buy something from the Croshame Etsy store! (Again, giveaway applies to orders made within the U.S. only.) Numbers will be assigned to customers in the order that they purchase items. If you purchase more than one item, you’ll be entered more than once! (Oh happy day.) The winner will be chosen via a random number generator and announced on the blog July 1st, and the winning entrant will also be contacted through their Paypal/Etsy email address.

GOOD LUCK!!


They’re all going to laugh at you

Believe it or not, I never went to my high school prom. Shocking, I know. It wasn’t due to the fact that I didn’t have a date (I didn’t) or couldn’t afford the ticket (I couldn’t), but I was just very skeptical and apathetic toward the whole school dance situation in general. So instead, I stayed home, ordered a large pizza from Round Table, and watched the best movie ever made…

Carrie (1976).

Even though I’m (long) out of school and no longer required to face the terror of teenage dance-angst, I still watch Carrie about twice a year. On my last viewing, as the school gymnasium burst into flames and various high school students were either burnt to a crisp, crushed or drowned, I knew it was that time again — time to crochet a horror movie tribute!

Presenting…

CARRIE BEAR!

Carrie Bear comes with her own sash, rose bouquet, and bucket of spilled pig’s blood; she’s ready to come home with you and telekinetically set fire to your heart.

Available now at the Croshame Etsy store!


Open up and say “Cheese” (NSFW)

The internet is a great place for many things: socializing with friends, finding historically inaccurate information, and looking at photos of kittens with infantile quotes written underneath them. But for all the eternal sunshine and endless giggles the information superhighway provides, there are just as many damp, dark, and disturbing corners filled with nightmarish imagery and unsettling ideas.

One such corner discovered and popularized by internet trolls some time ago was a phenomenon called Goatse. WARNING: If you’re unfamiliar with Goatse and have a low tolerance for the utterly repellent, I don’t recommend rushing out and doing a Google image search as it’s probably considered objectionable viewing material to 99.99% of the population.

Mr. Goatse seemed to get a pretty bad reputation fairly quickly, so to lighten up his persona a little, I’ve decided to create my own tribute to the “meme”-ory of this infectious image…

GOATSE CHEESE!

He’s all business in the front…

And all party in the back!

Awwwww… so cute!

Awwww… not so much.

Although I’m not expecting this one to exactly fly off the shelves (“Makes a great Easter or Mother’s Day gift!”), it is available in the Etsy store here.

They don’t call me Croshame for nothing, folks.


Crothulhu Tees Now Available!

Crothulhu t-shirts are now in the Etsy shop! Available in Ladies sizes Small, Medium, Large and X-Large.


Etsy Update 2.25.12

My pieces from the Luvable + Hugable show are now available for sale at the Croshame Etsy shop!

There’s the Crocheted Friends Forever:

TILLY, available here

and BREE, available here!

There’s Jumbo Wolfy Baby…

Available here!

And last but not least, there’s Rugby the Pugbee!

Available here!

These pieces are much bigger than my usual crochet work — each at least a foot tall — making them truly “Huggable!” They have also been marked down significantly from their original pricing, so grab ‘em while they’re hot!


Etsy update 2.16.12

Crothulhu prints are now available at the Croshame Etsy shop!

 I’ve recently gotten many requests for Crothulhu t-shirts. I’ve been trying to get some printed professionally, but finding a place to do it affordably is apparently harder than staying awake during The Mclaughlin Group – very difficult indeed. Until then, I will try to make some more shirts myself  in a variety of sizes, so please stay tuned for that.

Also a reminder (in case your memory is short) that The Odd Couple is currently available at the Etsy store as well!


Etsy Update 1.29.12

Now available in the Croshame Etsy Store, the compounded Catholic cuties known as

Conjoined Sisters!

Sister Mary and Sister Madeleine are two pious ladies fresh from the nunnery. They’re sometimes friends, sometimes enemies — but they’re always incurably inseparable!

Available here!

Also currently available in the Etsy store are my 2011 Plush You pieces:

Hostess with the Mostest! Available here  SOLD!

Imaginary Friend! Available here SOLD!

And last but not least, The Clown Box! Available here

All of the Plush You pieces are original, OOAK works and have had their prices highly reduced, so get them now while they’re still drastically slashed and bleeding!


Etsy Update 1.15.12

Announcing two new, deliciously adorable additions to the Croshame Etsy shop!

Kitty Catsup! (Found here)

and Weiner Dog on a Stick! (Found here)

These two compliment each other wonderfully, but you might want to separate them at the table since they fight like a couple of bottles and sticks. They’re both nutritiously yummy and notoriously perishable, so grab them now while they’re hot!


Etsy Update 1.7.12

The Etsy shop has been updated with two of my most popular (and previously unreleased!) Croshame pieces.

Krampus Time is Here Again! Available HERE.

And the Exorcist Playset! Available HERE.

Both sets currently listed are ready to ship, but if these sell I will be posting made-to-order listings. (Completion of each set takes about a week.)


Etsy Update 12.7.11

I come bearing GREAT TIDINGS OF JOY!!

The Croshame Etsy shop is pleased to announce its new inhabitant:

“TOILET POPER”

The Papal Toilet Paper Cozy!

Tired of all those heathen T.P. cozies stinkin’ up the joint?

YOU NEED THE TOILET POPER!

Toilet Poper even comes with his own fresh T.P. roll included!

Available here! Order yours today and get it in time for the Holidays.

For a full demonstration of the Poper’s amazing abilities, be sure to watch the video below!!


Etsy Update 10/11/11

Now in the Croshame Etsy store

BAGS!

(click on the title to go to the listing)

Monster Bag!

Frankenstein Bag!

Each features a fabric lining inside.

“Perfect for Halloween… which, of course, is every day!”

 


The So-So Socialite

Croshame is proud to present its latest creation…

Cairo Sheraton!

Cairo is a billionaire superstar heiress with the world wrapped around her little finger. When she’s not shopping at haute couture boutiques or partying at exclusive nightclubs, Cairo can be found posing for eager paparazzi with her canine accessory Twinkerball in tow. She enjoys long walks down Rodeo Drive, night-vision cameras, wearing skirts without panties, windy days, and pouting for extended periods of time.

Cairo comes complete with her little dog companion, Twinkerball, and a purse-full of cash for extraneous spending!

She also comes with some jewelry accessories: a “gold” necklace, “diamond” earrings and a “crystal” covered barrette! (Little does she know they’re just Bedazzler® gems! Tee hee)

Her arms have wire inside, making them posable!

And of course, Cairo’s skirt lifts up to reveal one of her best features!

(Click the picture above for the UNCENSORED version)

She’s now available in the Etsy shop HERE!


Etsy Update 4.7.11

Just in time for Easter, here comes everyone’s favorite trouble maker…

S’tan the Man!

He’s red hot and rarin’ to go home with a lucky friend and follower!

S’tan may be one handsome devil…

…bur He’d rather rule in Hell than serve in Heaven!

S’tan comes with his very own gold chain, for He IS the master of all pimps.

All hail S’tan!

Available here!


Etsy Update 2.27.11

Hey everyone! Sorry, it’s been a little while… I don’t know if I’m going to be upholding my 2011 goal of a weekly Etsy update as I had previously hoped. Croshaming up antigurumi is hard work, and my BCT (“Burgeoning Carpal Tendonitis” — now a new term in the Croshame glossary!) is presenting several roadblocks that make my previous schedule of crocheting 8-12 hours a day physically impossible. I’ve also been a bit distracted by some other, fiber-related things I’m working on, one of which I will be posting about soon!

Onto this week’s Etsy update. It’s a short but sweet one…

8.5 x 10.5″ EXORCIST PRINTS

NOW AVAILABLE!

One of my most popular pieces, The Exorcist Playset, was made by me in October 2010 and photographed by my husband Chuck McNary. The image is printed on high quality matte paper, and there’s even an option to get it signed and dated if you so desire. (And don’t worry — the croshame.etsy.com watermark will NOT appear on the print!)

Now available HERE!

 

 


Etsy Update – 2.10.11

Please enjoy these latest offerings from Croshame.etsy.com!

First, a new Croshame Wearable, the “Hogtied” pin! Have your pork & wear it too!

Next, an updated version of Grimm the Little Black Metal Guy!

Let this cute little church-torcher into your home and he’ll surely set fire to your heart!

And last but not least, we have Teen Wolfy!

This fuzzy heartthrob became the big wolf on campus after joining the school basketball team!

He even comes with his own little basketball.

And stay tuned for an upcoming Valentine’s update with more figures!

 


Etsy Shop Update – 1.24.11

Here’s this week’s Croshame Etsy addtions!

First up we have Very Rare Indeed.

He’s escaped from the clutches of a hungry fast-food patron and is looking for a nice patch of grass to rest his buns.

Very Rare Indeed

Very Rare Indeed Front

Very Rare Parts

Introducing Croshame Wearables!

There’s the “Lambchopped” pin!

Lambchopped Pin

The Yeti Hat for ladies!

Un-hat-ppy

And over at my Doomed to Live store, you can find these knit and crochet-related tees!

Octoknitter:

"Octoknitter" shirt

Crothulhu (Currently sold out — I am hoping to get more made soon!):

"Crothulhu" shirt