Happy Horrordays To You!
Just a quick post to advise folks to get their orders into the Croshame Etsy store for the holidays! (It should be taken into consideration that some custom pieces can take up to two weeks, sometimes three, depending on the order.)
I also have new pieces available for sale this year!
Feeling like you need some Krampus in your life… but just a little bit? Like, maybe a decapitated head’s-worth, just to cheer up the atmosphere?
Well, there’s the Krampus Door Hanger!
He comes with wire strung into the back of his head, making him perfect for hanging on the door, on the wall, or if you prefer, directly over the baby’s crib.
Available here!
And who wouldn’t want celebrate the Birthday of the Unconquered Sun by presenting their loved ones with the gift of androgynous eternal life? Well now you can, with that totes adorbs lil’ rapscallion…
Baphometsy Wetsy!
Iddin’t he kewt? Gods bless us, every one!
Available here!
And let us not forget our olden holiday friends from times past. Like silver and gold, they are!
There’s good old Santa Clawed:
Available here!
And that poor unfortunate Braindeer:
Available here!
Croshameless self promotion
Hey everyone! The Croshame Etsy store is now back up and running for all your misanthropic crochet and antigurumi needs.
Throughout the month of September and October use the coupon code “GGWHIZZ” at checkout for 10% off your purchase!
Croshame Summer Sale!
After going through one of the most grueling winters of my existence, I’m anxious to celebrate summer — even if it’s not technically starting until the 21st.
You know what that means…
That’s right, Mr. Sun! A sale!
During the month of June, anyone who uses the coupon code “SUMMERSALE” at checkout in the Croshame Etsy Store will receive 20% off ANYTHING in the whole dang shop (commission work excluded)! The sale ends on June 30th and the store will be temporarily closing for at least a few weeks shortly thereafter , so make sure to take advantage of these sweaty, hot deals during this month only!
Sale ends soon!
Just to poke you with the sharp stick of a gentle reminder, the Croshame Etsy April Mega-Sale is almost over — but there’s still a week left to get the Crochetin’ In Blood, Hogtied, Sid and Nancy, and Exorcist Playset at lowered prices.
Thanks, all!
Croshame Mega-Sale!
That’s right, you heard it here first, folks (or, if you were directed here from another source, you may have heard it here second). For a limited time throughout the month, four of my Croshame Etsy pieces are on mega-sale!
(*puts on best used car salesman voice*)
The Exorcist Playset has been blasphemously lowered from $250 to $150!
That’s a nauseatingly huge savings of $100!! Get that yarn vomit while it’s steamin’ hot!
Crochetin’ In Blood has been GOUGED from $90 to $70!
Yeee-OWCH! That’s gotta hurt!
The Who Killed Nancy-gurumi set has been SLASHED from $95 to $75!
Whaaat?!!! These prices are killing me!
And Hogtied has been SLICED from $90 to $70!
That’s one chunky slab of savings!
Sale prices and supplies are limited, so if you ever felt like owning these pieces but were an Andrew Jackson or two short, now is your opportunity to scoop them up!
New & cuddly Croshame Christmas characters
I’m proud to introduce two new members of my Croshame family, each accompanied by their own irritating Christmas poem!
Braindeer
One reindeer too many. Oh, what to do?
Bring him round back and grab the shotgun, too.
He’s too pretty to eat, so no venison this year.
Instead let’s stuff and mount him, our little Braindeer.
A holiday decoration bringing smiles left and right,
But they’ll be no visions of sugarplums for this guy tonight.
Over the mantle with care, in silence he’ll hang
Keeping watch over Christmas and bringing in 2014 with a bang.
(AVAILABLE AT THE ETSY STORE HERE)
Santa Clawed
This year St. Nick got quite a nasty surprise
When a flock of wild fowl went after his eyes.
Birds circled his head as fast as a rocket
and tore his orbs out, each one plucked from its socket.
Blood-curdling screams came from his belly,
and his eyeholes, they glistened like cranberry jelly.
So watch in the skies and mark my words:
Goodwill towards man is NOT for the birds.
(AVAILABLE IN THE ETSY STORE HERE)
Week long holiday sale on select Croshame items!
All this week get 10-20% off select items at the Croshame Etsy store! Just look under the shop section “SEASONAL ANXIETY SALE” for marked down pieces. (Sale will end next Monday, December 9th.)
Honed for the Horror-days
Looking for the perfect way to avoid that big-box shopper stampede while giving a unique gift and supporting handmade art? Well, just in time for this year’s Christmas consumerism feeding frenzy, the Croshame Etsy store is being stocked for the holidays!
Most of the Croshame “classics” are either presently in stock or can be custom ordered and made especially for you and yours this season! I’m currently working on a couple of new Christmas-themed pieces that I will unveil shortly, as well as preparing to set up a week-long holiday sale closer to December.
I’m also accepting commissions this year, but keep in mind that special order requests can take some time to complete, so please try to get your orders in early to ensure they arrive in time for your particular celebratory occasion. Thanks everyone!
(Click the sassy new banner above to visit the store!)
Back from vacation!
The Etsy store has been reopened. Please feel free to purchase items to your heart’s content! (Click image below to get to shop listings)
I’m also considering customers’ commissions once again; for details please see the “Commissions and Sales” page here: https://croshame.com/sales-and-commissions/
Thanks everyone!
2013 means ch-ch-ch-changes
With a new year comes new changes, and this year that adage also applies to Croshame. There will be several differences in the way Croshame operates in 2013, specifically because I’m going to be working on several big projects this year, but also because I’d like to concentrate more on making more fine art and creating new Croshame pieces.
NEW PIECES: Although I will still be making new Antigurumi characters and posting them here on croshame.com, I will no longer be making those featured pieces available for sale through the Etsy store. Don’t fret; there are still a plethora of “classic” Croshame characters that will be available.
COMMISSIONS: I will no longer be accepting commissions, at least for a while.
PATTERNS: I probably won’t be releasing any new patterns this year. This is partly related to one of the aforementioned “big projects” I’m working on, but I won’t mention anything else about that until things are a bit more fully formed.
Thanks to everyone for making 2012 a great year for Croshame! Here ‘s to a 2013 filled with many crass crafts and lotsa laughs.
Back in Business
As some of you may have read in a previous post, I took some much-needed time off from Croshame to make the move from San Francisco to Denver. It’s been a crazily busy couple of months, but now that I’m somewhat settled and have gotten my yarn and supplies out of storage, I’m ready to start crocheting again.
The Croshame Etsy Store has been reopened, and I’m set to start taking orders and commissions. Anything that’s marked “Ready to Ship” in the listing title is precisely that — a finished product that’s eager to make its way onto your doorstep ASAP.
HOWEVER — if you would like to order something marked in the listing title as “CUSTOM” or you’d like me to make you a special request or commission to be shipped out by the holidays, please get your orders in by November 7th. (Or if you don’t give a toss about Christmas, just order them whenever!)
Unfortunately I have very limited time and arm strength this year and won’t be able to work my crazy speed-crochet magic as I have in years past, so please remember that my two doozies, the Krampus figure and the Exorcist Playset, as well as more specific commissions, can take at least 2-3 weeks to complete.
I’m also hoping to make some neato-keen changes to the site and additions to the gallery and catalog in the upcoming months, so there will be all the more Croshame to love…
…or despise!
Etsy Update 6/3/12… and Giveaway!
Yes, yes, giveaway! But first, let me tell you what’s new in the shop!
I’ve introduced a new option to customize colors when you order a Wolfy Baby or a Viking Hat; just pick the two colors you’d like and I’ll whip ’em up for you!
Next up, Wolfy Baby’s new distant cousin, Yeti Baby. Available here!
Last but not least, the popular “Anton Crochet” devil cap — as seen at Maker Faire! Found here.
OKAY! Now onto the GIVEAWAY!!
Starting today and lasting through the month of June, anyone who makes a purchase (within the U.S.) from the Croshame Etsy Shop will be automatically entered into the 1st Official Croshame Customer Appreciation Giveaway!
I’ve put together a prize package with the following items (worth over $50!):
- A Croshame sticker set, featuring adorable drawings of Wolfy Baby, Tuggin’ At My Heartstrings and other Croshame creations
- A Crothulhu print
- Your very own Anton Crochet Devil Cap (available in Small, Medium, or Large)!!
All you have to do for your chance to win is to buy something from the Croshame Etsy store! (Again, giveaway applies to orders made within the U.S. only.) Numbers will be assigned to customers in the order that they purchase items. If you purchase more than one item, you’ll be entered more than once! (Oh happy day.) The winner will be chosen via a random number generator and announced on the blog July 1st, and the winning entrant will also be contacted through their Paypal/Etsy email address.
GOOD LUCK!!
They’re all going to laugh at you
Believe it or not, I never went to my high school prom. Shocking, I know. It wasn’t due to the fact that I didn’t have a date (I didn’t) or couldn’t afford the ticket (I couldn’t), but I was just very skeptical and apathetic toward the whole school dance situation in general. So instead, I stayed home, ordered a large pizza from Round Table, and watched the best movie ever made…
Carrie (1976).
Even though I’m (long) out of school and no longer required to face the terror of teenage dance-angst, I still watch Carrie about twice a year. On my last viewing, as the school gymnasium burst into flames and various high school students were either burnt to a crisp, crushed or drowned, I knew it was that time again — time to crochet a horror movie tribute!
Presenting…
CARRIE BEAR!
Carrie Bear comes with her own sash, rose bouquet, and bucket of spilled pig’s blood; she’s ready to come home with you and telekinetically set fire to your heart.
Available now at the Croshame Etsy store!
Open up and say “Cheese” (NSFW)
The internet is a great place for many things: socializing with friends, finding historically inaccurate information, and looking at photos of kittens with infantile quotes written underneath them. But for all the eternal sunshine and endless giggles the information superhighway provides, there are just as many damp, dark, and disturbing corners filled with nightmarish imagery and unsettling ideas.
One such corner discovered and popularized by internet trolls some time ago was a phenomenon called Goatse. WARNING: If you’re unfamiliar with Goatse and have a low tolerance for the utterly repellent, I don’t recommend rushing out and doing a Google image search as it’s probably considered objectionable viewing material to 99.99% of the population.
Mr. Goatse seemed to get a pretty bad reputation fairly quickly, so to lighten up his persona a little, I’ve decided to create my own tribute to the “meme”-ory of this infectious image…
GOATSE CHEESE!
He’s all business in the front…
And all party in the back!
Awwwww… so cute!
Awwww… not so much.
Although I’m not expecting this one to exactly fly off the shelves (“Makes a great Easter or Mother’s Day gift!”), it is available in the Etsy store here.
They don’t call me Croshame for nothing, folks.
Crothulhu Tees Now Available!
Crothulhu t-shirts are now in the Etsy shop! Available in Ladies sizes Small, Medium, Large and X-Large.
Etsy Update 2.25.12
My pieces from the Luvable + Hugable show are now available for sale at the Croshame Etsy shop!
There’s the Crocheted Friends Forever:
TILLY, available here…
and BREE, available here!
There’s Jumbo Wolfy Baby…
Available here!
And last but not least, there’s Rugby the Pugbee!
Available here!
These pieces are much bigger than my usual crochet work — each at least a foot tall — making them truly “Huggable!” They have also been marked down significantly from their original pricing, so grab ’em while they’re hot!
Etsy update 2.16.12
Crothulhu prints are now available at the Croshame Etsy shop!
I’ve recently gotten many requests for Crothulhu t-shirts. I’ve been trying to get some printed professionally, but finding a place to do it affordably is apparently harder than staying awake during The Mclaughlin Group — very difficult indeed. Until then, I will try to make some more shirts myself in a variety of sizes, so please stay tuned for that.
Also a reminder (in case your memory is short) that The Odd Couple is currently available at the Etsy store as well!
Etsy Update 1.29.12
Now available in the Croshame Etsy Store, the compounded Catholic cuties known as
Conjoined Sisters!
Sister Mary and Sister Madeleine are two pious ladies fresh from the nunnery. They’re sometimes friends, sometimes enemies — but they’re always incurably inseparable!
Available here!
Also currently available in the Etsy store are my 2011 Plush You pieces:
Hostess with the Mostest! Available here SOLD!
Imaginary Friend! Available here SOLD!
And last but not least, The Clown Box! Available here
All of the Plush You pieces are original, OOAK works and have had their prices highly reduced, so get them now while they’re still drastically slashed and bleeding!
Etsy Update 1.15.12
Announcing two new, deliciously adorable additions to the Croshame Etsy shop!
Kitty Catsup! (Found here)
and Weiner Dog on a Stick! (Found here)
These two compliment each other wonderfully, but you might want to separate them at the table since they fight like a couple of bottles and sticks. They’re both nutritiously yummy and notoriously perishable, so grab them now while they’re hot!
Etsy Update 1.7.12
The Etsy shop has been updated with two of my most popular (and previously unreleased!) Croshame pieces.
Krampus Time is Here Again! Available HERE.
And the Exorcist Playset! Available HERE.
Both sets currently listed are ready to ship, but if these sell I will be posting made-to-order listings. (Completion of each set takes about a week.)
Etsy Update 12.7.11
I come bearing GREAT TIDINGS OF JOY!!
The Croshame Etsy shop is pleased to announce its new inhabitant:
“TOILET POPER”
The Papal Toilet Paper Cozy!
Tired of all those heathen T.P. cozies stinkin’ up the joint?
YOU NEED THE TOILET POPER!
Toilet Poper even comes with his own fresh T.P. roll included!
Available here! Order yours today and get it in time for the Holidays.
For a full demonstration of the Poper’s amazing abilities, be sure to watch the video below!!
Etsy Update 10/11/11
Now in the Croshame Etsy store…
BAGS!
(click on the title to go to the listing)
Each features a fabric lining inside.
“Perfect for Halloween… which, of course, is every day!”
The So-So Socialite
Croshame is proud to present its latest creation…
Cairo Sheraton!
Cairo is a billionaire superstar heiress with the world wrapped around her little finger. When she’s not shopping at haute couture boutiques or partying at exclusive nightclubs, Cairo can be found posing for eager paparazzi with her canine accessory Twinkerball in tow. She enjoys long walks down Rodeo Drive, night-vision cameras, wearing skirts without panties, windy days, and pouting for extended periods of time.
Cairo comes complete with her little dog companion, Twinkerball, and a purse-full of cash for extraneous spending!
She also comes with some jewelry accessories: a “gold” necklace, “diamond” earrings and a “crystal” covered barrette! (Little does she know they’re just Bedazzler® gems! Tee hee)
Her arms have wire inside, making them posable!
And of course, Cairo’s skirt lifts up to reveal one of her best features!
(Click the picture above for the UNCENSORED version)
She’s now available in the Etsy shop HERE!
Etsy Update 4.7.11
Just in time for Easter, here comes everyone’s favorite trouble maker…
S’tan the Man!
He’s red hot and rarin’ to go home with a lucky friend and follower!
S’tan may be one handsome devil…
…bur He’d rather rule in Hell than serve in Heaven!
S’tan comes with his very own gold chain, for He IS the master of all pimps.
All hail S’tan!
Available here!
Croshame 